Nicole Austin – Scandalous

{December 26, 2007}   Thursday Thirteen #35

Thirteen Neologisms

An author friend recently shared these with me and since I love words, I decided to share them with you. The Washington Post has a yearly neologism contest in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common words. The winners are below.

1. Coffee (n.), the person upon whom one coughs.
2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained.
3. Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
4. Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk.
5. Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent.
6. Negligent (adj.), describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightgown.
7. Lymph (v.), to walk with a lisp.
8. Gargoyle (n.), olive-flavored mouthwash.
9. Flatulence (n.) emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.
10. Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline.
11. Testicle (n.), a humorous question on an exam.
12. Rectitude (n.), the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.
13. Pokemon (n), a Rastafarian proctologist.

*Bonus – I had to include them all
14. Oyster (n.), a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.
15. Frisbeetarianism (n.) (back by popular demand):The belief that, when you die, your Soul flies up onto the roof and get stuck there.

Links to other Thursday Thirteens!


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That’s so fun Nicole! This is better than the urban dictionary word of the day. I like the delicate puns – the ways words turn on themselves. Thanks for sharing!

Happy TT.

My TT is up: Thirteen people who inspired me in 2007.

These are great defination, better than the originals.

Happy TT

Ellen says:

I’m really feeling 2 and 3 right now! Funny stuff….

nicholas says:

I like those! Funny list.

Natalie says:

I love this list! Too funny!

My Thursday Thirteen is up too! 🙂

LA Day says:

Great list. Love #5!

DrillerAA says:

I think this is my favorite list so far today. I can definitely relate to No’s. 2 & 3.

Happy New Year and TT

Those are so funny!

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