Thirteen Ways To Survive Summer

(Yes, its summer here in Florida already)

1. Find a shady spot at a water park. Settle in with a cooler full of bottled water and a good book.
2. Get remote start for your car so the air conditioning is running when you make the hot trek from the house to the car.
3. Get a screened in pool installed in your backyard. Steal the children’s kiddy pool and put it under a shade tree as a cheaper solution. Or better yet, find a neighbor with a pool and get friendly.
4. Befriend an air conditioning repair person.
5. Work in a hospital, they’re always freezing cold.
6. Stock up on sun screen and use it! Sunburns can ruin your life for several days.
7. Put away dark, tight clothing and go with light and loose. Royal blue and white are the best for heat reflective qualities. Better yet, stay at home and dare to be bare.
8. Don’t eat spicy food. This will amp up your internal heat. Not to mention increased metabolism and taxing the digestive system raise body temps.
9. Find all the places in town with the best air conditioning, like shopping malls and restaurants. Libraries are excellent. They won’t kick you out for sitting around and reading.
10. Drink lots of non-alcoholic fluids (water, juice, sports drinks). Alcohol dehydrates.
11. Skip the potato or macaroni salad at the picnic or bbq. Mayonnaise in the hot temps equals deadly bacteria.
12. Sweating is actually desirable. It cools you down.
13. Buy a good, leave-in conditioner for your hair. Wash less often. Try rinsing and using the conditioner to hydrate dry, lackluster locks.

Links to other Thursday Thirteens!

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here! The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!
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It’s spring break week for the schools where I live. Tomorrow I get to take my son (12 year old) and his friend to the Adventure Island water park. While the boys are riding all the wild rides, I’ll be hanging out in a shady spot or riding along the lazy river in a tube. Mmm…if I remember right, they have an ice cream stand that makes yummy Root Beer floats. I just may survive the experience. LOL! 

The weather is perfect for some water play. Today the high temp rose all the way up to 86. We don’t really get spring here in Florida. We skip right past it to summer. No fall either, unfortunately. Just eleven months of summer and one month of cooler weather.

Blurb:

Sara believed Tristan died while stationed overseas. The last thing she expected on the eve of her engagement to another man was to be attacked by a monster…and have Tristan come to her rescue.

To everyone who knew him, Tristan McKade is dead. Only the SCS (Supernatural Control Squad), a top secret division of the military know differently. Sent back to his hometown, Tristan is on the hunt for the serial killer.

Sara McCoy is just beginning to move on with her life without Tristan. Ready to let go of the past, Sara is celebrating her recent engagement. The night is going well—until she notices a man lingering at the back of the room. His resemblance to Tristan too strong to ignore, she follows him outside, where he vanishes.

Unable to concentrate on his assignment, Tristan is determined to let go of the past before more innocent women die. In a bid for closure, he pays a clandestine late night visit to Sara’s house to say a final goodbye to the woman he loves—and the son he never knew he had.

Learning the shocking truth, Tristan and Sara are drawn into a bizarre triangle that pits them against The Mangler, an entity determined to possess Sara at any cost. A bloody battle of mind, body and soul ensues. Only one man will walk away alive—with Sara as his prize.

This is the first book in Mandi’s MIA series and I can’t wait to read the next, which I’m hoping is Shame’s story. <fingers crossed> Missing In Action will keep you engrossed from the first page. Tristan is on very hot alpha knight in tarnished armor. Sara sure can kick some butt when it’s necessary. Together, the two sizzle.

If you enjoy action and suspense, you’ll love this fast paced novel available from Samhain Publishing.

Thirteen Things I Do To Avoid Working

1. Read someone else’s work.
2. Surf blogs — see extensive list of blogs on right side menu.
3. Create new promo items.
4. Play at my Yahoo group, T&A’s Fantasy Playground.
5. Play email Scrabble at Bug Cafe.
6. Watch music videos at Yahoo Music.
7. Irritate my kids. Hey, it’s payback. LOL!
8. Hunt down new hotties pics for my extensive collection.
9. Search out new My Space friends. Wanna be my friend?
10. Sit outside and watch the neighbors.
11. Stalk my editors.
12. Take a nap.
13. Research.

Links to other Thursday Thirteens!

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here! The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!
View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

The cowboys are coming in 13 days…Yeehaw! To celebrate I’m giving away an ARC (Advanced Reader’s Copy) of Tamara’s Spirit. You could have the book in your hot little hands two days before it releases. 

To enter send an email to nicoleaustin1@hotmail.com with the subject “ARC” by March 31^st. My son will draw the lucky winners name on April 1^st. 

Good luck!

Only 29 days left until my daughters wedding…ack! Her grandmother says I don’t get to be the monster-in-law, I have to be nice. Now what fun is there in that? LOL! My daughter is doing good. We expected her to turn into a bridezilla, but she hasn’t.

At least I finally went shopping and found a dress. I hate shopping! Totally did not inherit the shopping gene. It somehow passed me by. Part of the reason is the way they make is so difficult. I went shopping the other night and began trying on dressed. I wear size 12 jeans and have size 12 dresses in my closet that fit, so this is where I started. Nope, zipper wouldn’t go up. Tried a 14 and had the same results. Even the size 16 wouldn’t fit. Now I’m mad. So what did I do? Got angry and left the mall, of course.  

The results of my solo shopping trip got my mother involved. Uh-oh. She dragged me on a marathon shopping trip to three different malls. Can’t tell you how many million dresses I tried on. Have I mentioned that girly clothes are horrible, uncomfortable things designed to make us suffer? I’d much rather wear my jeans and sneakers. Or even my work scrubs, which are like wearing pajamas. 

Sorry, got distracted. Anyway, at the third mall, I finally found a dress that was not completely uncomfortable and I felt would not kill me to wear for several hours. It’s even my normal size 12. Emailed a picture to my daughter and even got her stamp of approval. Woohoo! It was difficult to find a dress that wasn’t either too sexy for the mother of the bride, or too matronly, but I’m happy with what I got. Looks darker in the pictures than it actually is.

Sheesh! By the time all this is done and over, I’m going to need the cruise vacation I got for the kids honeymoon. Booked them a 5 day cruise. They start out in Jacksonville, Florida, spend a day in Key West, another in Nassau, Bahamas, then back home. My brother paid for their shore excursions. They’re going parasailing, snorkeling, and swimming with the dolphins. Sounds like a blast! 

I’ve been tagged by NJ Walters. This is fun! To any other authors reading this, please feel free to join in and add a bit of your WIP!

The instructions: Turn to page 123 in your work-in-progress. (If you haven’t gotten to page 123 yet, then turn to page 23. If you haven’t gotten there yet, then get busy and write page 23.) Count down four sentences and then instead of just the fifth sentence, give us the whole paragraph. 

Here’s an unedited bit of Jesse’s Challenge, Corralled Book 3, from page 23 (haven’t reached page 123 yet). I gave you a bit more than a paragraph. Enjoy!

“I’m sorry, Tink. My neighbor, Tom…er, I mean Jesse, came to visit.”
What the heck was she supposed to do with him now that she’d seduced the man like some shameless hussy? She couldn’t hide out here in the bedroom and leave him sitting out in the living room forever. Eventually she’d have to go back our there.
“Oh, my God. Did you let him in, Kate? What are you doing?”
“Good question, Tink. Hell, you got me into this. Got any bright ideas on how I should get out of it?”
Did she want to get out of it? If she were honest the answer was not only no, but hell no. She wanted more. More of his fingers touching, his lips tasting…
“I expect full, explicit, down and dirty details of what happens.”
“Thanks, you’re a big help, Tink.” Before she could say anything else, Kate felt his presence. Turning slowly, she faced the bedroom doorway. Jesse’s massive physique filled the frame. His penetrating gaze cut through all her natural defenses.  

I tag Annmarie McKenna. You’re it! 

I finally took the plunge and made a My Space page. Come on over and check it out. I’ve made some interesting friends, including some of the EC cover models. It’s a rather time intenstive venture, or time sucker as I like to call these things, but I’m having fun meeting new people.

A friend emailed me this and I had to share since I almost fell out of my chair from laughing so hard. *Spew Alert: Don’t eat or drink anything while reading!*

Texas Chili Cook Off

INEXPERIENCED CHILI JUDGE

Notes From An Inexperienced Chili Tester Named FRANK, who was visiting Texas from the East Coast:

“Recently, I was honored to be selected as a judge at a chili cook-off. The original person called in sick at the last moment and I happened to be standing there at the judge’s table asking directions to the beer wagon, when the call came.

I was assured by the other two judges (Native Texans) that the chili wouldn’t be all that spicy, and besides, they told me I could have free beer during the tasting. So I accepted.”

Here are the scorecards from the event:

________________________________________________________

CHILI # 1 MIKE’S MANIAC MOBSTER MONSTER CHILI

JUDGE ONE: A little too heavy on tomato. Amusing kick.

JUDGE TWO: Nice, smooth tomato flavor. Very mild.

FRANK: Holy shit, what the hell is this stuff? You could remove dried paint from your driveway. Took me two beers to put the flames out. I hope that’s the worst one. These Texans are crazy.

________________________________________________________

CHILI # 2 ARTHUR’S AFTERBURNER CHILI

JUDGE ONE: Smokey, with a hint of pork. Slight Jalapeno tang.

JUDGE TWO: Exciting BBQ flavor, needs more peppers to be taken seriously.

FRANK: Keep this out of the reach of children I’m not sure what I am supposed to taste besides pain. I had to wave off two people who wanted to give me the Heimlich maneuver. They had to rush in more beer when they saw the look on my face.
_______________________________________________________

CHILI # 3 FRED’S FAMOUS BURN DOWN THE BARN CHILI

JUDGE ONE: Excellent firehouse chili! Great kick. Needs more beans.

JUDGE TWO: A beanless chili, a bit salty, good use of peppers.

FRANK: Call the EPA, I’ve located a uranium spill. My nose feels like I have been snorting Drano. Everyone knows the routine by now get me more beer before I ignite. Barmaid pounded me on the back; now my backbone is in the front part of my chest. I’m getting shit-faced from all the beer.
________________________________________________________

CHILI # 4 BUBBA’S BLACK MAGIC

JUDGE ONE: Black bean chili with almost no spice. Disappointing.

JUDGE TWO: Hint of lime in the black beans. Good side dish for fish or other mild foods, not much of a chili.

FRANK: I felt something scraping across my tongue, but was unable to taste it, is it possible to burnout taste buds? Sally, the barmaid, was standing behind me with fresh refills; that 300 lb. Bitch is starting to look HOT, just like this nuclear waste I’m eating. Is chili an aphrodisiac?

_______________________________________________________

CHILI # 5 LINDA’S LEGAL LIP REMOVER

JUDGE ONE: Meaty, strong chili. Cayenne peppers freshly ground, adding considerable kick. Very Impressive.

JUDGE TWO: Chili using shredded beef, could use more tomato. Must admit the cayenne peppers make a strong statement.

FRANK: My ears are ringing, sweat is pouring off my forehead and I can no longer focus my eyes. I farted and four people behind me needed paramedics. The contestant seemed offended when I told her that her chili
had given me brain damage, Sally saved my tongue from bleeding by pouring beer directly on it from a pitcher. I wonder if I’m burning my lips off? It really pisses me off that the other judges asked me to stop screaming. Screw those rednecks!
________________________________________________________

CHILI # 6 VERA’S VERY VEGETARIAN VARIETY

JUDGE ONE: Thin yet bold vegetarian variety chili. Good balance of spice and peppers.

JUDGE TWO: The best yet. Aggressive use of peppers, onions, and garlic. Superb.

FRANK: My intestines are now a straight pipe filled with gaseous, sulfuric flames. I shit myself when I farted and I’m worried it will eat through the chair. No one seems inclined to stand behind me except that slut Sally. She must be kinkier than I thought. Can’t feel my lips anymore. I need to wipe my ass with a snow cone!
___________________________________________________

CHILI # 7 SUSAN’S SCREAMING SENSATION CHILI

JUDGE ONE: A mediocre chili with too much reliance on canned peppers.

JUDGE TWO: Ho Hum, tastes as if the chef literally threw in a can of chili peppers at the last moment. I should take note that I am worried about Judge Number 3, He appears to be in a bit of distress as he is cursing uncontrollably.

FRANK: You could put a grenade in my mouth, pull the pin, and I wouldn’t feel a damn thing. I’ve lost sight in one eye, and the world sounds like it is made of rushing water. My shirt is covered with chili, which slid unnoticed out of my mouth. My pants are full of lava-like shit to match my damn shirt. At least during the autopsy they’ll know what killed me. I’ve decided to stop breathing; it’s too painful. Screw it. I’m not getting any oxygen anyway. If I need air, I’ll just suck it in through the 4-inch hole in my stomach.
____________________________________________________

CHILI # 8 LESTER’S LAST OF THE RED-HOT LOVER’S CHILI

JUDGE ONE: A perfect ending, this is a nice blend chili, safe for all, not too bold but spicy enough to declare it’s existence.

JUDGE TWO: This final entry is a good, balanced chili. Neither mild nor hot. Sorry to see that most of it was lost when Judge Number 3 passed out, fell over and pulled the chili pot down on top of himself. Not sure if he’s going to make it. Poor Yank, wonder how he’d have reacted to a really hot chili?

JUDGE THREE: No report.

Blurb:

How much trouble can one small female be to a modern-day shapeshifting Viking? Well…it really depends on local gun laws.

Conall Víga-Feilan, direct descendent of Viking shifters, never thought he’d meet a female strong enough to be his mate. He especially didn’t think a short, viper-tongued human would ever fit the bill. But Miki Kendrick isn’t some average human. With an IQ off the charts and a special skill with weapons of all kinds, Miki brings the big blond pooch to his knees—and keeps him there.

Miki’s way too smart to ever believe in love and she knows a guy like Conall could only want one thing from her. But with the Pack’s enemies on her tail and a few days stuck alone with the one man who makes her absolutely wild, Miki is about to discover how persistent one Viking wolf can be.

This is hands down the best book I’ve read in a while. It has everything. At times I was laughing out loud, getting strange looks from my family. The characters are written so vividly you’ll see and feel everything they do. I could see the look on Miki’s face when she went into one of her angry rants. And I could see Conall loving every second.

The sex is scorching, the action riveting, and the laughs hysterical. The story will keep you on the edge of your seat and rapidly turning pages even though you’ll want to take your time and savor the experience. You’re going to have to read this one twice, because the first time you’ll fly through the book. I’m getting ready to start reading it again.

I can’t recommend Go Fetch highly enough. This second book in Shelly’s Magnus Pack series is as good as the first and can be read as a stand alone, but I recommend getting both books! They’re both must reads!

Available from Samhain Publishing